A day in the llife of the schiff
by Darkness-is-absolute
Summary: COMPLETE CRACK! moses ooc! funny! i decided that blood plus needs more stories like this! my first fanfiction! R&R!


A day in the life of the Schiff!

By: leah-chan55

Warning: this is crack, it is also my first story, so suggest themes if you like, like, perspective it's told from or characters it should include, or even challenges for the characters! So here's the first chapter! Please enjoy!

Moses looked up from his cell phone "damn, how come I can never get to my Email! ANGER!" then he threw his phone at Karmen who just happened to walk into his room at the moment. He got up and walked over to the passed out Karmen with X's in his eyes. He stared at Karmen before deciding to go play video games downstairs. As he walked down, he saw Lulu was about to go answer the door which was ringing non-stop. She opened the door only to see a girl who looked like she had just gotten done eating two pounds of crack. The girl saw Moses and shouted, "TOOOOOOMMMMMM!" before running into the house and glomping him. Then she looked up to a bewildered, yet, angry Moses and said, "I tried to eat all the bunnies like you said but….THERES TOO MANY!" Moses' face turned many shades of red out of anger before kicking the girl off. She quickly latched onto one of his legs and Moses hobbled over to the broom. Lulu had already brought a lawn chair and some popcorn into the house to watch the fun. Moses grabbed the broom and started smacking the girl shouting, "YOU MESSED UP MY EMAIL DIDN'T YOU? KYA KYA!" Lulu laughed immensely at the randomness that was Moses. After about five minutes of explaining over and over that he was not "Tom" the girl stood up and walked out the front door like nothing had ever happened.

Later, at lunch…

Karmen had a gaping hole in his forehead; everyone of the Schiff stared at it in wonder. "Ohm, what is with the hole in your head?" asked Irene.

Karmen looked over to her, with a pancake sticking out of his mouth, then he pointed to Moses, "Moses….Email….phone, do I even need to explain more?" Irene looked over to Moses who was stabbing his pile of pancakes with a knife and a, "I'll kill you with my Geass" look on his face. Irene looked back to Karmen, "oh, it's THAT time of the month isn't it?" Karmen nodded. Whenever Moses was in one of his death moods, it took at least three weeks to get back out of it. This is to say, he was almost never, NOT in a death mood. Suddenly, Charles (from the manga) came bursting through the door, leaving a Charles shaped hole. He took one look at Moses who was glaring at him with a sign that came out of nowhere stuck to his shirt. It read "everywhere you go, I follow you, and if I do, you know I have a hit list, and you're on it." Charles considered this and then walked past the dining table and into their living room. He took there TV, brought it back into the kitchen and smacked Moses over the head with it. Irene had a happy face plastered on now. "Thank you doctor, I can always depend on you." Charles nodded and then held out his hand. Irene shook it. "No, I want money." Charles replied simply. Karmen then took this chance to reach into the hole in his head and pull out a one-dollar bill. "This is all we have for now." Charles took one look at the blood and brain covered money before replying, "…on second thought, you keep that, and you might want to get Moses to a hospital, I might have given him a concussion." Everyone simultaneously looked at Moses who had passed out. "Yeah, we'll do that later. It looks like he's enjoying his nap." Then Charles began towards the door before tripping. Then he stood up and walked through the same hole he had made upon entry. "I love my life." Said Lulu, watching Karmen put the money back into his head.

Five hours later, at hospital…

Moses woke up, his head was throbbing and he had the sense to kill something. He looked around to see all his faithful friends and companions gathered around him. They all smiled and he frowned, reaching towards Karmen, he grabbed his neck and began to shake him deathly. "FUCK YOU ALL! ONE OF THESE DAYS, ILL GET AN IPHONE! AND YOU'LL BE SORRY!" he shouted, before sobbing. Karmen passed out about two minutes later.

Everyone decided it would be best to lock Moses in his room with steel re-enforced doors and windows whenever he was like this.

Just another normal day…

END!

**SO, WHAT DID YOU GUYS THINK? R&R PLEASE! SHOULD I CONTINUE LIKE THIS, OR SHOULD I MAKE IT IN SOMEONE'S POINT OF VEIW? OR MAYBE A DIARY? I DUNNO, SEND CHALLENGES FOR THE CHARACTERS TO FACE! THANK YOU!**


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